Revolutionary, Tinder is the new online dating app phenomenon. Launched in 2012, it already matches millions of singles every day and it’s becoming more and more popular. Despite its success, the principle of “love at first swipe” is at the center of a controversy. It raises questions: Can love really spark from connections purely based on physical attraction and mutual “swipe”? Is Tinder made for long-term commitment or for “no-string attached” relationship?
Well, as of today almost 3 million people have found their match on Tinder and one marriage proposal per day originates from Tinder couples. Yet, many singles and psychology specialists describe Tinder as a hook-up app. Countless women and men use Tinder like gays and lesbians uses Gaydar… For a quick hook-up!
I’m all for love and destiny and also a strong believer of the multiple ways leading to a romantic story. So, undoubtedly, from my perspective, Tinder can be a place to find long-term love (like many others).
I met Doris, 28 year-old artist from Astoria, who met her date on Tinder 8 months ago. Here is the story she told me: “[…]I gave it a try. It was easy, free and quick to use. After a couple of days of swiping, I got matched with Justin.[…] He looked so charming and nice. We chatted for a few days and finally met. There was so much chemistry between us. We’ve been dating since then; I’m still in love and I’m glad I tried the app.” Doris is one of the hundred lucky people who enjoy a sentimental outcome from their Tinder experience.
Tinder is a great dating tool for those who do not have time for the dating search. It breaks the ice and is effective. Instead of randomly meeting someone the traditional way in a cafe or a bar etc., trying to catch his/her attention and start a conversation, here, you get to choose singles of your choice, by swiping their pictures to the left, if you don’t like their appearance, and to the right, if your are attracted. It’s as simple as that!
It is still too early to assess the length and strength of the relationships which debuted on Tinder. However, the apparent prosperousness can be counter-balanced by two nuances:
* Love shouldn’t be based solely on physical attraction.
Sadly, on Tinder you’re not judged by the book but by the cover, while attraction also relies on much more than a static picture (which can be old or not reflective of the actual person). Attitude and personality are determinant aspects. If you want to use Tinder for its efficiency and as a first filter, stay open-minded.
* Tinder can turn into an addictive and soul-destroying app.
Singles can spend hours selecting a potential mate, while waiting to be found or rejected. Huh? How can’t this be unhealthy? The risky thing is that basing love search on making a snap judgment could lead people to be even shallower and, on the other side, damage a person’s self-confidence. The truth is true love is blind and you may even end up with a guy like the one you just left-swipe.
I would recommend to try and try again, and take your time. Know your worth and what you are here for. And don’t be discouraged if you don’t get matched. If it’s meant to happen with the person you like, it will. If not, it’s not meant to be. But yes, you can find love on Tinder.
Found a serious date on Tinder? We would love to hear your stories, please share at contact@NewYorkDatingLife.com